For your consideration (but mostly entertainment), some sage advice on how to win an essay contest…
1. Surf the web with no explicit purpose during your writing time aside from procrastination
2. Find an essay contest that looks very interesting and get excited about it.
3. Get a few ideas for said essay contest almost instantly (because you’re full of many things, especially ideas)
4. Read rules of essay contest and calculate that today is Friday, the entry is due on Monday.
5. Furiously rough draft one topic idea. Allow draft to take you over 1,000 words despite contest limit being 300 words.
6. Set aside rough draft, thinking, “I have two days left to play with it.”
7. Awaken at 2:30 a.m. Friday night/Saturday morning and realize that your math and calculation skills are the reason you went into English teaching. Essay deadline is not Monday but Sunday. And you’re going to be gone almost all day Saturday.
8. Spend most of Sunday chop, chop, chopping words mercilessly, tightening prose, gritting teeth in anger because your idea that seemed so full of promise on Friday is just a weird, random, creative thought that can’t compete on the level of personal essay.
9. Submit the damn thing anyway late Sunday afternoon.
10. Get an email on Wednesday from the author sponsoring the contest to inform you not that reading your essay was a waste of time but that you WON FIRST PLACE (sorry for the shout. You’re a little excited!)
Now, mind you, every author’s experience is different. This is only what works for me 
Think I’m making this up? Check it out for yourself: (no lemons were harmed during the writing of this essay)
True Genius Essay Contest First Place Winner at CreativityPortal.com
(or, “The Lemon Essay That Won Me the Contest).
Any advice you’d add for upping your chances at winning a writing contest? Or for getting the lemons out of your head?
{ 2 comments }
Congratulations, Beth, on a great essay and the win.
Thanks, Lillie. I just stopped by your blog and found the mention of the Lemonade award (congrats!) to be slightly ironic
Thanks for visiting. Your blog looks like a great place. I’ll stop by and say hi soon!
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